I'm a Mother

For Mother's Day, I wanted to feel like a mom.  Last year, I was madly in love with a tiny person inside me, but I wasn't quite a mom yet.  Mostly, I was just big and hot and hungry.  Devin made sure to pamper me last year, but the day really was just about me.

Something amazing happened last summer.  A tiny baby Calvin was placed in my arms and suddenly nothing was about me anymore.  I wanted nothing more than to take care of his every need.  I felt like a completely new person.  And, in many ways, I was new.

Since then, many little things about me changed.  My dreams, my instincts, my goals, and my thoughts have all had at least some shifts.  Some changes have been more challenging than others.  But, even on the hard days, I have loved motherhood so, so much.  

When Calvin reaches for me, or says mama, or buries his face in my shoulder, my life feels complete.  When I pick him up from sleep, and he melts into me, I feel content.  I loved to hold him and rock him and smell his hair while he sleeps.  But he's also becoming so much fun!  He does hand motions to songs.  He dances and giggles and will gladly find anyone's nose if you ask him.  He points out his belly button and points his little finger trying to be bossy.  He grabs favorite books and toys when you ask him where they are and says "mmm!" with every bite of food.

For Mother's Day, I wanted to enjoy being a mother.  I didn't feel like I needed a break from it, but I wanted a day where I didn't care if Calvin fought his nap or teething wasn't going well or there were other things I needed to do.  So, we read extra books.  We sang extra songs.  We played extra long. We let him stay up a little late, too.  Calvin was an absolute joy the whole day long, and I soaked up every minute of it.  Then, I rocked him extra long.  I sure do love being this little boy's mother.

Happy (day after) Mother's Day!